Hello everyone!
I realized I hadn’t done one of these types of posts where I analyze a broad question about mental health/life in a while, so today I decided to write my thoughts on this particular question that had been sitting in my drafts. I will be dissecting the question posed in the title of this post: is it even possible to be 100% stress free? The short answer is no, as most of you probably suspected, or even knew from your own experiences with stress. But why? Let’s talk about it.
So first of all, even if you don’t know the science behind this or much about how our brains work/bodies respond to stuff, I bet you could infer based off of your own life that there’s always going to be some stress. Driving creates a lot of stress for some people, being late to events, having a lot to work, worrying about the current COVID-19 pandemic… there’s always things going on in your life that are going to cause some stress. Some people are way better handling this than others (hint: I’m horrible at handling stress so not me), but even the most relaxed people or disciplined people in managing stress will have that first response of worry before they use their coping tools to calm themselves down.
As far as the science behind it, stress is a natural bodily response to scary/intense/worrisome situations and our attempts to face them. Stress triggers the sympathetic nervous system, which in turn triggers our body’s fight-or-flight response. In fact, this Psychology Today article by F. Diane Barth discusses how we even stress about relaxing or stress about our current stress because of the body’s responses to the initial stress. It’s a really interesting article, and Psychology Today is a great place in general to look up answers to any psychology-related questions you may have, so you should check that out if you’re interested; I used it a ton as a resource for random questions when I was taking AP Psych online.
Based on both general intuition and scientific principles of the brain and our responses to stress, we know that it’s impossible to eliminate stress completely. But what about the people who get really close, and don’t seem to experience much (if any) stress in their lives? Well, as cheesy at it sounds, I think it’s all in your perception of things. First of all, people may be freaking out internally, but keeping a calm front as not to alarm others; we’ve all done that at least once before, right? I know I do it with my family members if I’ve accidentally messed up or made a mess that I need help cleaning up. Second, even if people are more laid-back, it’s usually just in their nature based on the household they grew up in, or they’ve worked very hard to make themselves better at coping with stressful situations.
For example, if you work under high-stress conditions at a corporate job, you’ll probably end up adapting after a few years and more trivial tasks won’t stress you out as much. As far as the home environment thing goes, some people grow up in families where their parents were laid-back people as well, so they grow up holding onto that lifestyle. My dad has apparently always been someone who barely ever gets stressed out, and I’m guessing he always will be.
Other times, it takes a ton of discipline to develop the coping tools some people need to deal with stress in a healthier, more manageable way. I’ve been trying my best to do this since I was in my later years of elementary school, as I’ve always been an anxious person who gets stressed when there’s not even much to be worried about. Here I’ll include a short list of some things/tools that help you get better at dealing with stress, and things that have worked for me.
- Meditation – When I’m really overwhelmed, this is the only thing that quiets my mind. I like to use the Headspace app, but I only do the free ones- I haven’t gotten a subscription yet. I’ve also heard the Calm app is good, but I’ve never tried it.
- Reframing – This helps you get out of your head in “worry-land” and brings you back to reality. Remember when you get stressed, you’re usually only focusing on the bad in a situation, so you’re not looking at the full picture. Reframe your perspective to find the silver lining and/or assure yourself everything will eventually be okay, because it will!
- Being positive/using the Law of Attraction – If you keep telling yourself positive things, you’ll start to believe them, and then they’ll come true. I’ve mentioned the Law of Attraction a few times on this blog before, and I highly recommend at least giving it a try.
- Reading self-help books – Honestly, this isn’t a direct link to lowering your stress, but I always feel so organized and put-together in my life when I’m reading a book about how to be just those things. I highly recommend finding some reading material, particularly related to whatever areas of your life you’re stressing over.
I hope this little list helps anyone in need of some ideas to reduce stress, and I hope you’re all doing okay under the stressful conditions at the moment. Just remember you will be fine as long as you wash your hands and make smart decisions as far as following government orders, and try to make the most of your time at home. Let me know what you do to reduce your stress if you have any helpful tips as well 🙂
Brooke
adventures of a typical high school student 